Roses are Red, Violets are Blue

What are some really funny poems but are appropriate for school?

Public Comments

1. One Evening Waves of pink clouds flowed across the sky, their dogs were playing in the field nearby. They, listening to the birds and a distant jet while sitting on the hilltop watching the sunset. As the sun went down and the sky got dark, wind began to howl and the dogs began to bark. They jumped up and ran for home, yet... the rain came first and got them all wet! by Mary A. Rager The Flea Once there was a flea, who landed on me. Food was on his mind, so he bit my behind. Before I could give him a thump on me he created a bump. Now whatever I do or say, I itch and itch and itch all day! by Mary A. Rager The Tiger and the Zebra The tiger phoned the zebra and invited him to dine. He said "If you could join me that would simply be divine." The zebra said "I thank you, but respectfully decline. I heard you ate the antelope; he was a friend of mine." On hearing this the tiger cried "I must admit it's true! I also ate the buffalo, the llama and the gnu. And yes I ate the warthog, the gazelle and kangaroo, but I could never eat a creature beautiful as you. "You see I have a secret I'm embarrassed to confide: I look on you with envy and a modicum of pride. Of all the creatures ever known," the tiger gently sighed, "It seems we are the only two with such a stripy hide. "Now seeing how we share this strong resemblance of the skin, I only can conclude that we are just as close as kin. This means you are my brother and, though fearsome I have been, I could not eat my brother, that would surely be a sin." The zebra thought, and then replied "I'm certain you are right. The stripy coats we both possess are such a handsome sight! My brother, will you let me reconsider if I might? My calendar is empty so please let us dine tonight." The tiger met the zebra in his brand-new fancy car and drove him to a restaurant which wasn't very far. And when they both were seated at a table near the bar, the zebra asked "What's on the grill?" The tiger said "You are." "But please, you cannot dine on me!" the outraged zebra cried. "To cook me up and eat me is a thing I can't abide. You asked me for your trust and I unwarily complied. You said you could not eat me now you plan to have me fried?" "And what about the envy and the modicum of pride? And what of us as brothers since we share a stripy hide?" "I'm sorry," said the tiger and he smiled as he replied, "but I love the taste of zebra so, in other words, I lied." --Kenn Nesbitt
2. Look through Roald Dahls poetry - hilarious stuff, generally. Betjeman and Carrol have some great comic poems, too.